Have I forgotten You?

I am sitting now. On the cubicle at the office corner, Not exactly corner, because right beside my right side is my GM office. Anyway, thats not what I am talking about.

I am talking about job. As I begin to wonder, what am I doing now? As I begin to question, am I successful right now?

Weird. Many people can see, I am working and blogging in middle of my workhour. I am chasing one meeting to another, befriend with laptop. I might do what I have been dreaming: A fancy young executive. Huge workload. Well, not to brag. But I am stepping up the career ladder. So exicted to chase upon the upper position.

Then, I heard this question: Are you successful?

I would say for now I am satisfied on what I have achieved.

Then, the question begin again, what are you successful at? Matters?

I was ashamed to answer that. Because I know where the question will lead.

I was too busy, then I forgot to do rituals or make my ibadah qualified. Is that what I want to achieve?

Is that what I catch? A dunya?

Then, I will be so ashamed if I answer yes.

Have I forgotten you?

Then I feel all emptiness within my self. I have earned anything in my life. Money I earn is nothing. If my attention and intention only for it.

I just want You. Do everything for you. Make everybreath of my life for you.

I turn to You. Insya Allah.